


Time Off Dating, or, The return of Remus Lupin

by WanderingBandurria



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bets & Wagers, But things got out of control so it's a long one, F/M, Feelings Realization, First War with Voldemort, Fluff and Humor, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Hand Jobs, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, James Potter is a Good Friend, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Language, Mild Smut, Minor James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Miscommunication, Mutual Pining, Nice Peter Pettigrew, One Shot, Pining, idiots to lovers, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:40:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23716066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WanderingBandurria/pseuds/WanderingBandurria
Summary: Sirius decides to take a break from dating after a few horrible experiences. He’s now focusing on his friends, fighting the war and figuring out where he stands in all this mess.And then Remus gets back in his life after almost a year away with the werewolves on behalf of the Order. And it’s the same old Moony with his cardigans, sarcasm, soft eyes and thoughtfulness. And at the same time, he’s not. He has roughened up. He has a wild glint in his eyes, and sometimes he goes quiet, all intensity, while biting his lips. Sometimes he looks at Sirius like that, and Sirius suddenly doesn’t know what to do with himself.But none of this matters to Sirius, because:1. He has never dated a man and doesn’t know how to go about it. But even more,2. He. is. not. dating. at. the. moment.So it doesn’t matter if Remus makes him feel queasy and warm inside. It doesn’t matter that he has caught himself repeatedly daydreaming about kissing Remus’ scar over his lip, and then make him sigh and smile with his soft-Moony-eyes.Doesn’t matter, because Sirius is taking a break from dating for a reason, and Remus is just a friend. And that’s the end of it.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 50
Kudos: 381





	Time Off Dating, or, The return of Remus Lupin

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there! So, this was going to be a short, silly one shot, but things got out of control, and here is this 11K monster. Be mindful that there's some angst (First War with Voldemort is spelled with Angst). I tried to keep it as lighthearted as possible, but well, my attempts at humour are at best feeble. There's also some smut, so be mindful if it's not your thing. If you like the trope (oblivious idiots that don't realize that they are together), I wrote [This shorter story that is T rated](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23034073), because yeah, when I start working on an idea, I need to explore it until I can't think about it anymore. So if you like the premise but not the smut, or you just want more of it, you can go and check that. 
> 
> Peter and James are not assholes in this fic, so take that into account too. I just went with what I thought would make more sense with what they were living at the moment.
> 
> English is not my first language and even when all my love goes to [Remustrash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Remustrash/pseuds/Remustrash) (go and read their work!) for reading and correcting this when it was on its first versions, it's mostly unbetaed since I changed a lot, so all the mistakes are mine, of course. Please, if you spot any error - spelling, verb tenses, word uses - let me know so I can improve my English. If you do it gently, you'll earn my eternal gratitude.
> 
> And with that, thank you so much for reading! please review if you can, it would mean the world to me.

\---

  
  
  


Sirius slams the door when he gets into his flat. He has only 5 hours before he is meant to be in the Order’s headquarters, from where he is heading to a Safehouse to follow a lead on a possible Death Eaters attack that can keep him away from home for weeks. He huffs. With the limited time, he just lost 3 hours trying to break up a relationship he didn’t know he had.

“Shite Padfoot, what happened?” James asks from the sofa, where he’s cuddling with Lily.

“Hell. Hell happened” He mutters, tired. “Don’t want to talk about it.”

“Were you attacked by a horde of Pixies, mate?” Peter asks, laughing, pointing to his head, where Sirius knows his hair is tangled like jungle vines - and the _colour_ of vines too.

“Don’t want to talk about it,” he sing-songs from the kitchen.

“Well,” Lily starts, “It could be worse, you know? I heard that Elle made Fab’s eyebrows purple when they broke up. It lasted for over a month, no one was capable of lifting the charm. Amazing at them, she is. She was the one that taught me that sticking charm that kept you up the common room ceiling for a night. Do you remember, James?” 

“Happy memories, happy memories, Lils. Now, I just have to say, and I know you’ll be happy to hear this, Evans, but you were right. I don’t know how to pick my dates. So, having you lot as witnesses, I declare my dating life in a pause.” He can see Peter’s incredulous face. “I mean it, mate. I won’t date for the next six months. I’m done. I need to think about what I want in life and stop losing time looking for a woman that I can stand, so I can have a relationship that I don’t think I want right now. With everything that’s going on, I just want to have time for what’s important: friends, kicking death eaters to the ground, and sex. Which I can have much more easily without dating.” He adds when he sees James open his mouth to object.

“Isn’t that a bit extreme, Padfoot?” James says instead.

“I can actually set you up with some girls that I know, Sirius,” Lily adds.

“No, no. I mean it. I’m really tired of everything that dating involves. I don’t care if you have my soulmate under the rug, Lily. I’m not in the state of mind to let someone in.” He pauses, then decides to just go with the truth. “When Elle was interrogating me about who I’d been with the past 3 days, I almost burned down her flat with a burst of uncontrolled magic. I really need to take care of myself, and that doesn’t include a girlfriend right now” he says resolutely.

“Wow, Padfoot, that’s actually pretty… mature” James says.

“Yeah, mate,” Peter jumps into the conversation, full of nervous energy. “But just to be sure that you don’t break your own rules, here.” He gives Sirius a parchment and quill. “I took the liberty of putting what you said on paper. If you break your promise of not dating for six months, you’ll owe each of us 30 galleons, all right? And to be clear, ‘dating’ is defined as taking to a socially relevant event someone you’re sleeping with; being referred as someone’s boyfriend by the other person or a third party, or hanging out with someone you clearly have a romantic interest in - even when you don’t recognize it, so we are going to be the judges of that - on your own more than three times in a two-week span.”

Sirius signs the parchment with a flourish of the quill.

“Not a problem. I’ll keep my word, so don’t count on the money, Wormtail.”

And with that, he storms off to his room to get his things ready for the next day’s assignment.

\---

He gets back home a month later, tired, confused and proud of himself. Caradoc and he managed to gather tons of information about how the Death Eaters are organizing their attacks, synchronizing them with Muggles political events to cover up. They managed to stop the interference of wizards in a protest, so no Muggle was seriously injured, at least not by magic, although the Muggle Police killed a guy and injured another, so they had to stay a bit longer than expected to follow the developments and prevent more Eaters’ activity.

He flops down on the sofa, sighing happily at the comfort, and is ready to fall asleep when he hears James’ footsteps coming to the living room.

“You are home! You won’t believe - ” James almost yells to him.

“Lo, Prongs, nice to see you, how are you? I’m alive, thank you; tired, but alive” Sirius interrupts, exhausted.

“Ugh, Padfoot! turn around, I have something to tell you,” James commands. Frowning, Sirius obeys. “Erm,” James blinks at him, surprised that he listened. “Thank you.”

“Well, what's the news, James?” 

From behind James comes a voice that Sirius hasn’t heard in over 10 months.

“Hello, Sirius. I’m back, that’s the news. How are you?”

Remus looks ragged, his clothes old but clean. He is skinnier than Sirius remembers and has some new scars on his neck. His hair is longer than ever, partly covering his eyes and brushing his neck. He is smiling with a softness that was always reserved for his friends, but in his eyes, there’s something new, something warry and feral.

Sirius wants to scream, punch Remus, sleep and wake up to be sure this isn’t a dream, and hug him, all at the same time. Trying to get up too quickly, he overbalances and falls to the floor, from where he crawls on his feet and runs to his friend who hasn’t answered a letter and about whom they only have heard an occasional statement from Dumbledore - ‘he is alive and carrying on his work _’_ \- in over _10 months_.

So Sirius pushes him with all his strength. In normal circumstances, this wouldn’t make Remus bat an eyelash but, apparently, he’s also out of his depth with this encounter, so he almost falls to the floor. Sirius catches him by the arm in the last second and pulls him in a tight embrace, sinking his nose in Remus’ neck, inhaling his smell, the dog in him recognizing his friend better this way. He can tell that he’s tickling Remus, but he doesn’t care. And it doesn’t really matter because Remus is returning the tight hug fiercely, resting his forehead on Sirius’s shoulder tiredly, like he’s ready to cry. Sirius’ fingers dig on his back and Remus fists his shirt desperately. 

“Bloody hell, Moony, I could kill you myself, mate. Not even one letter in all this time. Thank Merlin you are alive, you wanker” he mutters against Remus’ ear.

Remus only nods, his nose buried in Sirius’ shoulder. Sirius supports him and feels the heat radiating from his body, soft and recognizable even after a year without it. 

_Moony is home,_ he thinks. _Moony is home_ , and he starts laughing, squeezing the man in his arms, his chest warm and the heat going through his veins to the rest of his body.

“Welcome back, Moony” he manages to say between hiccups of laughter.

Remus nods again, tightening his grip. Sirius feels some humidity against his shoulder, but he doesn’t really care because his own eyes are filled with unshed tears of happiness and relief.

\---

That night they go to their usual pub. It’s just the five of them for now, and Remus is laughing at Peter’s retelling of the misadventures of Sirius’ dating life, digging now on his brief romance with Laura, a Spaniard that was convinced that Sirius would look better blond, so she charmed his hair while he was sleeping (honestly, what was with people’s fixation with his hair?).

Sirius knows he should be ashamed, but watching Remus relaxed and happy is priceless. His friend has been avoiding the questions about his life with the Pack in Scotland, asking instead about their lives in London with greedy attention.

Peter then tells Remus all about Sirius’ decision not to date anymore and Remus’ eyes dart to him. There’s curiosity in them, but also a mischievous glint that makes Sirius’ stomach jump on his belly. He takes a long swing of his beer to try to distract himself, but he can feel his pupils glued to his friend’s, like there’s a magnet in them. He thinks he looks like a complete creep drinking with his eyes fixed on Remus, and he can feel his face heating up. Luckily, he doesn’t blush easily, but he still feels a bit dazzled. 

“Well,” Remus says, and his tongue darts out of his mouth to lick his lips, and _Merlin balls_ , _what’s wrong with Sirius,_ because he is gaping at Remus like he’s the only person at the table and he can feel the heat pooling on his navel, “then I guess I came back at the right time, don’t you think, Padfoot?” Remus’ eyes shine, and as background, so, so far away, he can hear Peter’s, James’ and Lily’s laughter. “Right on time to see you fail miserably” he finishes, grinning innocently.

Sirius doesn’t have an answer. Luckily, he is saved by Marlene and Dorcas arriving at the bar, and Marlene’s shrill scream when she sees Remus makes him break eye contact. Sirius finishes his drink for good measure.

\---

“Hey, Prongs. Doesn’t Moony look a little different now?” 

“Well, yeah. He’s been away for a long time. He’s thinner and has all those gashes on his neck, but under all of that is the same old Moony, isn’t he?”

“Well, yes, but don’t you think his eyes are like… I don’t know, deeper, more intense?”

James goes silent, swaying slightly in his place because of the alcohol.

“I think he’s been through a lot of shit, Padfoot. Before you arrived, he hinted at some things, but it’s clear that he doesn’t want to talk about it. I’m just grateful that he is back, and all in all, still the same funny, sneaky bastard. We just need to give him time to recover and then, I’m sure, he’ll tell us what’s weighting his soul.”

Sirius nods, gravely, as if James, as usual, had just gotten what he meant, because he can’t say _well no, Prongs, I didn’t mean it in that sense, I meant like he has this heat in his eyes that I’ve never seen before; this magnetic quality, like the wolf is right behind the surface and ready to pounce over you and you can’t stop looking even when you know you shouldn’t._

\--- 

Peter owls them the next day saying that Remus is going to stay with him indefinitely and that they’re going to Remus’ mother’s house in the afternoon to pick the few things that he left there, and if they want to, they can go too since Hope has cake for all of them. James answers that they’ll be there before Sirius can figure out why his stomach is full of knots and his mouth dry at the mention of Moony. 

When they arrive at the Lupins’ cottage, Remus is in the front yard with a crooked smile on his face. His eyes sparkle when they meet Sirius’, and he pats James in the back so that he gets inside to say hi to his mum. James goes happily, jogging all the way to the kitchen.

Sirius and Remus walk slowly behind James. Remus grins at Sirius and says “I have something for you upstairs, I found it while I was packing,” so after hugging Ms Lupin, they go to his room. Peter and James stay in the kitchen, filling themselves with cake and pretending to order some frozen meals that Hope is actually packing for them.

When Remus closes the door of the small bedroom, Sirius feels his heart thrumming in his ears. He tries not to focus on Remus’ mouth because it’s probably something weird to do, but at the same time, he’s not sure he can understand a thing Moony says if he doesn’t read his lips.

Remus is flushing when he gives him his leather jacket. “You lent it to me the last full that we all spend together, but I had to leave before I could return it to you,” he says.

Sirius is overjoyed to have it back, all his previous nervousness forgotten. He already bought a new jacket, but this one, this is his first jacket, his most precious possession for so many years. 

“Merlin, Moony! All of this time without knowing that you were responsible for my broken heart,” he quips, and Remus laughs.

The jacket looks worse for wear, but it’s clean. Sirius takes it to his nose, breathing deeply. Remus’ coloured cheeks go darker, his hands deep in his pockets. 

“Mh, smells like you,” he blurts out before he can think, “you sure you just found it now while packing?” he smirks at Remus, one eyebrow raised.

“Well, no. I took it with me to Scotland” he says, looking sheepish. “I actually had something else for you,” he adds, and Sirius can feel his nerves catching fire again. 

Remus gives him a framed photograph in which the four of them are waving and pushing each other. They look around 15, all of them awkward limbs, except Remus, who always had a different relationship with his body and looks perfectly youthful. _Really cute_ , his brain provides but is quickly dismissed.

“It was going to be your birthday present, but, well…” he trails off. “I know it’s not much, I didn’t have money at the time, so I charmed it so we can visit other pictures of ourselves like portraits. That way, you can know what are we up to when you don’t feel like waiting for an owl, or you only need to know if we are alive and breathing, see?” he looms over his shoulder, making Sirius shift on his feet to hide the shudder that goes through his spine. Remus pokes at Little-Photo-James, who yelps indignantly but soundless. In the process, his hand touches Sirius’, who’s fingers suddenly feel heavy and clumsy. “James, can you please go and check how many cakes have you had?” Photo James grins, and after giving a thumbs up and pushing Photo Sirius out of his way he steps out of the frame. “The thing is that each of us can only find ourselves, so you can ask Picture-Prongs to go looking for him, but not for Lily or Marls, even if they have pictures of us, so you can use it only to check on, well, us. I couldn’t make us talk either, so we can only answer with gestures. I know it’s not that good, but I couldn’t manage to change the spellwork. Maybe with more time…”

“Moony, stop babbling.” Sirius smiles to Remus over his shoulder. “It’s an amazing spell. I really love it. And the picture is great too. I wish I had it while you were away.” He says softly. “Nevertheless! It’s a wonderful gift, Remus. Thank you so much.” Sirius’ heart swells with tenderness, but then Remus smiles and the wild glint in his eyes is back, and Sirius feels himself tremble. He tries to snap out of it, so he jokes. “I’m surprised, though, that you are giving me this. So many possibilities for pranks, Moony, so many possibilities. You should have known better.”

They stumble back into the kitchen, pushing each other, Remus pretending that he is trying to take the photo out of his hands. Sirius feels light and happy, like no time has passed since Hogwarts. Like he hasn’t been without his friend for the past ten months.

  
  


\---

They get into a routine over the next two months, and just like that goes the first three months of Sirius’ life without dating. Remus and Peter visit Sirius’ and James’ every Monday and Wednesday and they cook dinner together. Lily usually arrives when they are about to sit down to eat. On Fridays, they go for a movie and then get some drinks at the pub. Saturdays are spent with the rest of their friends, and on Sundays, Peter goes to see his mother, Remus cleans up their flat and James and Lily go house hunting. Most of the time is like Remus never went away, and they act like it’s just like _before_. But underneath that, Sirius knows that it’s not. Remus is more reserved and sometimes closes up without clear reason. And it’s not only in that sense that things are different; sometimes, he can feel Remus’ eyes all over him. His strange nervousness when someone mentions his friend or when they are together hasn’t faded away either. 

Most Sundays Sirius stays home, watching the telly or working on his bike, but a couple of times he decides to visit Remus. They joke and laugh and eat noodles and Remus looks at him with his eyes that shine as if they could melt gold, and Sirius is not sure what to do with himself when he suddenly wants to shove his friend against the wall and rut against him while Remus looks at him with that heat in his gaze, until they are hoarse from screaming. Sirius attributes this desire to his lack of sexual life, because with the Marauders back on full form and the war raging, he hasn’t been to the bars to pick up women. It’s not that he doesn’t have the time: Thursdays are date night for Peter and James and Lily, and Remus is usually busy with Order’s stuff - or that’s what he says. A couple of times Peter has implied that most Thursdays Remus doesn’t go back home, and Sirius has felt a white panic at the thought of Remus in any sexual situation, and he hasn’t been able to stop thinking of how Remus must look while fucking either. 

Again, it’s not for lack of time, it’s just that he doesn’t want to go and pick random girls to fuck, for some reason.

The full moons are okay. Remus doesn’t want them there; he says that the wolf has spent a lot of time with other wolves, and he’s not sure it will recognize them. And at the beginning of that first moon, it looks like he was right. Moony snarls and shows its teeth, and Padfoot and Prongs have to fight it a couple of times. But then, the wolf seems to settle and relax, and starts licking the dog’s fur, and nuzzles the deer, and even lets the rat get on its back. The next moon is easier, and they play and chase rabbits, with Prongs and Wormtail watching from the distance.

And then, on the same week, James is sent on a mission that’ll have him in the Continent for six weeks; Peter goes home to take care of his sick mother, and Lily has an internship in a magical hospital in the United States for 12 weeks. Of course, James’ and Lily’s trips were planned from a while ago, but the fact that Peter is gone is unexpected, and Sirius feels it deeply. In the period that Remus was away, they had grown closer, falling in easy camaraderie, because there are only so many times that you can run into James and Lily fucking before you take action and start spending some time outside the flat you share. 

Sirius only learns about Peter’s mum next Monday, when Remus arrives alone to his flat, winking when he tells him that it’s just the two of them.

Sirius is pleased, he really is. Of course, he enjoys his time with his friend; Moony is great at talking and joking and cooks amazingly, and is always willing to help Sirius’ organizing outbursts. He also knows when Sirius is about to go insane with everything that’s going on in the war; when he can’t cope anymore with people disappearing and new attacks to Muggles. And he has shown in these months that he knows exactly what to do to help him, being that lighting a cigarette, a joint, taking Padfoot for a walk, or asking for his help with some made-up activity like fixing the flat wards, translating an ancient parchment, or going out shopping for a new LP. 

So it doesn’t make any sense that Sirius is so nervous that he drops the parchments in his hands when he realizes that he’ll be alone with Moony for the next three hours. Remus laughs and his eyes pierce him like he can read his thoughts, but then he just goes to the kitchen to start dinner. Sirius is not sure he can deal with being alone with Remus; he feels too hot and like something is stuck in his throat. 

Over the past months, there’s no denying that Remus flirts with him. 

The flirting has always been there in jokes and innuendos, but after ten months apart, Sirius can see clearly how much they do it. He’s not sure, but he thinks that Remus flirts more bluntly now. He doesn’t blush, stutters or gives an exasperated look at Sirius’ jokes: now, he gives back his own flirty comments, bites his lip more frequently, and keeps fixating Sirius on his place with his wild eyes.

“What do you think about going out for dinner?” Sirius asks, offering the only idea he has to avoid being alone at home with this man. Remus’ head pokes out of the kitchen. 

“Your treat?” He asks, sticking out his tongue. 

Sirius just nods, feeling dizzy with the desire to take Remus’ face with his hands and sit him on his lap so he can kiss the scar over his lip and touch that tongue with his. He wants to lay him down on the sofa and snog him until both of them are panting. 

To stop himself, he gets up, takes his jacket, tosses Remus his coat, and steps out of the flat.

\---

They get into a new rhythm, just the two of them now. And even when Sirius is still nervous around Moony, he is also enjoying being together. Things go easily from going out to eat, taking a walk in the park, catching a movie, or going to the museum, to accompanying each other in everyday activities like buying groceries, stationery, or pieces for his bike. They search for new vinyl in the muggle music store and grab drinks with other members of the Order. It’s after the second time that they go out with them that Remus stays at Sirius’ for the first time. They are a little too drunk, and Sirius forgets his panic around Moony and insists that they Floo to his flat since it’s closer. Remus stays in James’ room, and Sirius dreams all night about Remus getting into his bed in the middle of the night with some excuse - _it’s too cold; I had a nightmare; Oh, I got lost after going to the loo!_ \- which leads to Sirius tangling around him on his sleep - _Oops, I’m so sorry Moony, I was asleep_ -, and Remus pushing against his crotch and exposing his neck for Sirius’ lips and whispering the filthiest things, moaning everything that he wants Sirius doing to him.

When Sirius wakes up all sticky, Remus is making breakfast, and they eat it while chatting and laughing. Sirius feels like he is going crazy, but he can’t do anything except act like nothing weird is going on inside his head. As far as Sirius knows, Remus is not interested. The flirting can be just the way they’ve always joked around. Sirius has no way of knowing because he is such a mess of desire and longing, that he can’t trust his own judgment anymore. 

Of course, he wants to fuck Moony, but that doesn’t mean he is going to do it. He doesn’t really care that he’s a man (even when he is a bit nervous about how that would go), it’s just that Remus is too good for him, too precious to be messed around with.

Remus moves into James’ room surreptitiously with Sirius’ encouragement. He makes Remus stay after they fall asleep in front of the telly. Then he tells him to bring some clothes in case he needs to stay again. Next, he asks him to stay and help him with some work for the Order. 

And without realizing it, three weeks go by. 

They decide to visit Peter next weekend, after he owls them telling that his mum is better.

\---

He can feel Peter's eyes glued to his nape even before he makes his presence known. He and Remus are finishing cooking, and at the moment, Sirius’ hand is on Remus’ lower back while he tastes the spoonful that Moony is offering so he can help with the seasoning. It's so domestic that Sirius wants to laugh of pure happiness. 

In the last weeks, his nervousness around Remus has faded away, being replaced by a sweet tickle in his stomach and warmth in his chest. Of course, he still wants to make Remus sit on the counter and bite his neck and get on his knees to suck him off (and _oh, this is a new fantasy_ ) but that's just because of his self-imposed celibacy. The daydreams about going on holidays together to an isolated cabin where they can be naked and have breakfast are just slips of his mind that can’t process friendship and sexual attraction together. 

He gets back into reality with Peter clearing his throat behind them. Remus turns to give him a bright smile. 

"Better now with that shower, Pete? We are almost done here, do you want a cuppa? You'll have to help me figure out where your mum keeps her tea because I had no luck finding it."

"Yeah, don't worry Moony. I'll make the tea, you and Padfoot can go and sit in the living room."

Sirius follows Remus, feeling like a child caught misbehaving that waits for a talk. Not that he would know about it; Walburga would always hex first, scream later.

"Moony!" Comes Peter squeaky voice from the kitchen, "can I ask you for another favour? Would you please bring a cup of tea to my mum? If I go, she'll start complaining about it immediately, and I'm too tired for it. She’s been asking about you and won't forgive me if she knows you were here and didn't say hi. Padfoot, on the other hand, is better just staying here."

"Hey! What do you mean with that? Your mum adores me." 

"Don't worry, Pete.” Says Remus, smiling mockingly at Sirius. “I'll go."

As soon as Remus' steps can be heard on the stairs, Peter appears in the living room with two cups of tea and biscuits, raising an eyebrow.

"What?" Sirius asks looking to the ceiling, exasperated.

"Out with it, Padfoot. Don't force me to say it."

Sirius frowns, the smug expression on Peter’s face only forgivable because the mixture with fear makes it pretty funny.

"What do you want me to tell you, Wormtail?" He sighs, trying to avoid the conversation, "Have you heard about Prongs yet? The bastard hasn't contacted me once yet."

"Oh no, you are not avoiding this conversation, Padfoot," he shifts on his feet and then decides to leave the tea and biscuits on the table, so he can knit his fingers over his belly. "You owe me 30 gallons, mate."

Sirius laughs to hide his panic.

"What are you on about, Wormy? I'm not dating anyone, I don't owe you anything!"

Peter sighs, long and suffering, and quirks an eyebrow while playing with his hair, a striking imitation of James. He even lowers his voice to match Prongs'. 

"So it's the denial road then, isn't it? My, my, Padfoot, I know you are stubborn, but sometimes it's hard to understand how you manage to be a functional adult." He puffs his chest, full-on Prongs mode, and Sirius pokes him on the head when he sits by his side, annoyed. Peter bats his hand away. “Well, good thing I put it all on paper then. The third rule, remember? If you spend more than three days in two weeks with someone you have a romantic interest on, you are dating. And if Moony’s letters are anything to go by, then you have been together almost every day in the past weeks, so...”

Sirius frowns.

“Well, I don’t have a romantic interest in Moony, Wormtail, so I’m sorry, I owe you nothing. And I hang out with Remus because he is my mate, so don’t try to trick me into giving you money. Even more, the third scenario sounds stupid, because if Moony doesn’t think that we are dating, and _I_ don’t think we’re dating, then we, simply, are not” he says triumphantly.

“Oh, Padfoot!” Peter sighs again. “We said that you might be in denial and that we’ll be the judges of the ‘romantic interest’. And by the way you look at Moony is clear that you have a crush on him. The only one that wouldn’t see it is Moony himself, because he never thinks that anyone is into him, so he doesn’t count.”

“Oh, just drop it, Peter” he frowns. “I’m not paying you. Remus and I are not dating. Even if you _think_ that I’m into him, Prongs and Lily are not here, and I’m sure they would agree with me that you are delusional. So just stop, and don’t you dare talk about this when Remus is back. I’m not having Moony avoiding me just because of your tricks to take a few galleons from me.”

Feigning being piss off was always a good shortcut with Peter, who just looks ashamed, mutters something that sounds like _you_ _are delusional, wanker_ , and starts munching on a biscuit.

\---

The next full moon is only the two of them, and it’s good. In the morning, Sirius’ apparates them in his flat. He takes care of Remus for the next two days. Remus is in a good mood, he jokes about Sirius’ cooking skills and gives him this sweet and tired smile that disarms him. 

The third day after the full, Sirius gets home in the afternoon and is greeted by James and Remus talking in the living room. 

“Prongs!” he is surprised to see his friend, and he feels a bit guilty for the disappointment that bubbles in his chest at the realization that his time alone with Moony is over.

“Well, I should get back home,” Remus says while standing up. Sirius feels his stomach turn.

“Why don’t you stay here today, Moony?” He says, aiming for nonchalance. “We can watch a movie after Prongs tells us all about Italy and explains why he’s here early. You can stay in my room so you don’t have to take Prongs’ snores.”

“Well, that sounds nice, but I’m still quite tired. And, well…”

“I need to speak with you on our own, Pads,” says James, who’s been following the exchange between them with curiosity.

Sirius is intrigued, but everything is forgotten for a second when Remus says “see you around, Sirius” with a mischievous smirk that goes straight to Sirius’ soul before disappearing in the green fire.

\---

It turns out that James has been back in England for a couple of days, but he’s been on Godric’s Hollow where he found a house that covers everything that he and Lily want. So, even when they are already engaged, James is going to ask her again to marry him when she gets back, so they can have the ceremony as soon as possible. James is happy with Lily, for sure, but he is also scared of the war. Emmaline Vance, who was with James for a few days in France, went missing. That made Moody call James off his assignment, fearing that their communications had been compromised.

After the next Order’s meeting, the moods are quite gloomy, so when the Prewetts invite them to their flat to party, they all agree quickly, except for Remus who stays behind to talk with Dumbledore, his eyes dark and illegible. Before his friends leave, he squeezes Peter’s shoulder, wishes James good luck with Lily, and says goodbye to Sirius. his fingers lingering on his back when he walks past him in the crowded hallway.

Sirius mind understands what goes unsaid and he darts after him, catching Remus before he gets into Dumbledore's office.

“You are leaving again.”

Remus only nods, not turning his back, his hand lingering over the doorknob. 

“Fuck sake, Moony, you can’t do this to us.” You can’t do this to _me_ , is what he wants to say. “You can’t just leave and act like it’s any other day.”

“I’m sorry,” says Remus, finally turning, his eyes ablaze. “I’m sorry,” he repeats softly like he is trying to pass a secret message to Sirius that he’s clearly not receiving.

Sirius gulps, eyes fixed on his friend, wanting, wanting so bad, but not sure how to take it.

“When you’re back, move in with me, yeah? I don’t want to be alone, and I know that Peter has been thinking about going back to his mum’s to help her. I’ll help him moving your things to my place in the meanwhile, alright?”

Remus frowns. He opens his mouth to protest but then closes it. He just nods.

Sirius feels desperation boiling inside of him. He clenches and unclenches his fingers, and before he can think, his hand is on Remus’ cheek, caressing it. Remus’ face falls against his palm, his eyes closing briefly. He opens them again, and they are feral and tender.

Sirius gulps.

“Take care, Sirius.”

“You too, Moony.”

\---

At the Prewetts, Marlene throws an arm around his shoulders. Sirius laughs happily at her dishevelled looks.

“Hey, Black, where’s your boyfriend? Haven’t seen him since the meeting.”

“What boyfriend?” asks James, who is too wasted to understand anything.

“Oops, did I misunderstood the situation?” Marlene chirps after a beat, full of joy.

Peter raises an eyebrow and mutters “Second scenario” but finds his beer label incredible interesting after Sirius’ deadly glare.

“Oh, Ha Ha, McKinnon, really funny. How much is Peter paying you?”

“What? Paying me for what? Pettigrew, do you have money for me?”

“No, Marlene, Sirius is just in denial and trying to blame me for his crush.”

“Oh, I see, typical Black behaviour. So, where is Remus then?”

Later, Sirius gets Peter off his back by stating that 1) Marlene was clearly joking, and 2) the parchment clearly says that he is supposed to be referred as someone’s boyfriend, and not the other way around, so take _that_ , Wormtail.

\---

Remus is back a week later, his mission a complete failure, he admits, not looking sorry at all. Relief floods over his friends when he returns undamaged: just two days before, Benjy Fenwick and Fabian Prewett ended up in St. Mungo’s, and no one is sure when they are getting out. 

Over the next two weeks, James moves out, buys an absurd amount of plants and goes three times ring shopping, dragging Sirius with him. In the meantime, Remus moves in, and Peter returns to his mother’s home. 

Things look normal again, even if he spends an abnormal amount of time fantasizing about Moony’s mouth.

It’s a Saturday morning and he and Remus are having breakfast when an owl arrives for Sirius. Frowning, he opens the envelope. 

“It’s from Andromeda,” he smiles, “she’s inviting me to have dinner with them for her birthday next weekend.”

“That’s nice,” Remus says gently, understanding the mixed feelings of Sirius for his cousin, even when she was disowned too.

“Would you go with me?” Sirius asks, munching on his toast.

Remus looks shocked for only a second.

“Sure” and he gives another sweet smile to Sirius.

\---

“Okay mate, this is getting ridiculous. Just pay us already and be over with this!” Peter apparates in his flat next Thursday when Remus is out. James is coming in an hour to plan the details of his dinner with Lily, who gets back the next day. Sirius sighs.

“What’s now, Peter? How come that Remus and I are dating, again, without any of us knowing it?”

“Padfoot, you invited him to a social event to which none of us is going! It is basically calling it a not-friends event!”

“Merlin, Peter, read your own rules! The first scenario involves me and Moony sleeping together, which we are not, so stop being greedy, because you are not getting my money!”

Peter grumbles something that sounds a lot like “obnoxious prat, I’m doing this for your own good” while he retreats to the kitchen for a beer.

Sirius only has one more month without dating, but he’s not really looking for the end of his vow. The thought of spending some time away from his friends doesn’t sound that appealing, and he knows that when the time is up, Lily will insist on setting him up with one of her friends, and he won’t have any excuse to say no.

\---

Next Saturday they arrive at their flat stumbling and giggling after dinner with Andromeda. Her birthday celebration was a bit awkward but overall nice. Sirius flops on the couch, feeling like he crossed a milestone; like building bonds with the good people in his family makes him older and more mature.

Remus starts walking to the kitchen to make tea, but Sirius stops him, taking his wrist. 

Remus turns, surprised. Sirius doesn’t let go of his arm.

“Hey, Moony” he pauses to enjoy for a second Remus’ eyes on him, and the soft acceleration of his own pulse. “Thank you for going with me tonight.”

Remus smiles and drops himself on the seat next to him.

“Not a problem, Padfoot. I had a great time.”

Sirius hand leaves Remus’ wrist and crawls to his hair, combing it softly. Slowly, his fingers descend to Remus’ cheek, like the time they said goodbye before Remus’ latest mission.

He can feel his breathing getting heavier, and he knows he’s staring at Remus’ lips, but he can’t manage to tear his gaze off. He can feel Remus’ eyes on him, taking him completely. His brain is frozen, the only thing he can feel is Remus’ skin under his fingertips, the loud thump of his own heart and the hot desire curling in his stomach and spreading to the rest of his body.

Remus licks his lips and his fingers fondle with his parted mouth. He looks uncertain and Sirius can feel a slight tremor going through his body. And then, suddenly, Remus’ hand is on his neck, finger splaying delicately, and not only is Remus leaning over, but he is _moving_ , all of him, to straddle Sirius. This is more than Sirius thinks he can take without losing his dignity, but somehow, he manages to smirk, and secure his other hand on Remus’ hip, while he pulls him in with the hand in his cheek that slips to Remus’ nape for a better grip. 

Their lips meet and their mouths open, and there’s nothing to hide from Sirius’ side: his desire is crystal clear, his fingertips rubbing Remus’ hip softly, his tongue knowing what to do even when his brain is numb. They kiss and kiss for what feels like hours, mouths full open, small moans getting trap between their lips, their breaths heavy and slow. And then, Remus pushes down all his weight on his lap, and Sirius struggles to breathe and has to pull away to swear, his eyes seeking Remus’ darkened gaze.

He is back quickly at kissing Remus, now with clear intent, his hands roaming on Remus’ back, his tongue seeking Remus’. They part again, Sirius laughing while he kisses Remus’ neck, Remus struggling between laughing and moaning. 

“Is this alright?” Remus asks in a small, breathy voice.

“More than,” Sirius bits his ear softly, his hand moving slowly to the front of Remus’ trousers with his finger tracing the hem of it, while Remus pushes down again. “Fuck, Remus” he moans, “can I?” he asks, playing with the button.

Remus nods, too busy lapping at Sirius’ neck. Without pause, without thinking that he has never done _this_ before, Sirius unbuttons Remus’ trousers, and then does the same with his own, his hand forgetting the task and his head falling back when Remus’ hands crawl under his shirt and his mouth nibbles on his collarbones. He pushes up, rubbing against Remus’ crotch, moaning at the shot of pleasure. Remus makes the most delicious sounds and keeps kissing his neck, following the push and pull that Sirius’ marks with his hand in Remus’ hip. Their mouths meet again, tongues tangling and untangling, both of them already panting and whispering words of encouragement whenever they manage to gather some air. 

When the friction starts to be too much, Sirius’ hand goes back to his jeans, taking his cock out. Remus bites his lower lip before he is back on his neck, but he can hear him mutter “fuck” when he sees him, his voice heavy and low with desire. He licks his own palm and gives himself a few strokes before the want to see Remus overcomes him. He pushes Remus’ trousers as far down as they can go given their positions, and all his attention goes to Remus’ hip area where he sees the contour of his hard dick. He takes some time to touch him over his underwear with the tips of his fingers, giving then a hard squeeze that makes Moony moan, laugh and bite his shoulder in retaliation. Sirius moans and seeks for Remus’ cock under his pants. And fuck, he feels dizzy with desire when he touches the soft and warm skin. He takes him out, and he can’t stop himself from biting his lip at the sight.

“Look at me,” he asks while he licks his palm again, taking both their cocks in hand. 

Remus’ shudders at the command and complies, putting his forehead against Sirius’, sighing and moaning and licking the contour of Sirius’ lips with the tip of his tongue. Sirius’ starts jerking them off, Remus’ gaze fixed in his, all that molten gold, feral wildness directed to him. Remus’ hand goes to his parted mouth, and Sirius thinks he’s about to have a stroke when he sees him put two of his fingers into his own mouth, sucking them with his eyes on Sirius’. He can only swear yet again. He knows from Remus’ mischievous smile that he’s being toyed with. Not that he cares, watching Moony licks his fingers has to be one of the most erotic visions of his life.

Remus mutters a wandless spell that Sirius’ doesn’t know what it does, his eyes too busy looking at Remus’ big pupils to understand magic, and then his hand gets down to help Sirius, touching himself for a second before taking Sirius’ cock in his hand, so he suddenly realizes that that was a _wandless lubrication spell_ , _and how does Remus know that, the sneaky bastard,_ before he has to close his eyes for a second to enjoy the sensations. Their eyes meet again when the strokes become faster and their hips began to move with them. 

“Fuck, Sirius” mutters Remus against his mouth, and the only thing that Sirius can do is respond with long, frenzied strokes. He pushes desperately against Remus’ fist, and when he feels Remus’ push deeply and scream, he chances a look down, and the vision of Remus’ coming on his hand is more than he can take. His hand on Remus’ hip goes to grip Remus’ fisted fingers around his penis to keep them moving, and he pushes against his hand a couple of times before looking back at his face, still contorted with pleasure. And that does it, because he is also coming then. 

Saying that is one of his best orgasms might be an understatement. He feels like he’s never coming down and he wants to cry and pass out and keep going forever. 

When he finally manages to open his eyes, Remus is there, looking at him with his soft eyes and laughing quietly while he cleans his hand on Sirius’ shirt.

\---

Remus doesn’t want to talk about it, that much is clear. He has deflected Sirius’ attempts effectively with a couple of “it was fun, wasn’t it?” and a heavy gaze that leaves him speechless, only able to corner Remus into a wall and snog him. Remus complies laughing and gropes Sirius’ buttocks, and just like in Sirius’ fantasies, he whispers the filthiest things in Sirius’ ear without even blushing. 

James and Lily have settled on getting married in a couple of weeks with only their closest friends - the times are not for big parties. On Wednesday, the five of them are dinning at their new house when Lily asks “So, any of you want to bring someone to the wedding?” with the most innocent look on her face.

“I was thinking to ask Mary to go with me, what do you guys think?” Peter chirps, unsure but happy. 

“Well,” James starts “not sure if it’s the best idea, mate. What if she says no? She still would be there, wouldn’t that be awkward?”

“Good thing that I have it from first source that she would say yes,” Lily says, smugly. Peter lightens up, giving Lily a grateful look. “What about you, Remus? Someone you want to bring?”

Remus tenses up at Sirius’ side. He breathes out, his eyes on Lily.

“Not really, Lily, I don’t have a boyfriend right now.” He enunciates slowly and clearly. “Even more, I think it would be lovely to have all the time to be with you guys.” He smiles nervously, and Lily returns the smile sweetly and reassuring, nodding slightly.

Silence falls on the table, and then, Peter says “Boyfriend? Whaaat? You like men, Remus? Shocking news, shocking news indeed, oh my…” 

Generally speaking, Peter is a good liar, but apparently, when it comes to lying to his friends, he sucks at it. The good thing is that his bad acting makes James and Sirius make eye contact and burst into laughter.

“Okay, okay boys” Lily is grinning, but her voice admits no discussion, and she is taking Remus’ hand. “I guess you gathered that Peter already knew, but please stop laughing and tell Remus that everything is okay and that you don’t care who he sleeps with, or he might become a puddle of uncontrolled magic and melt to the ground.”

James sobers up first, smiling to Remus “Why would I care, Moony? I’ve been waiting for you to tell us since we were in Fifth year and I run into you sucking faces with Fab. You almost got me thinking that you were just experimenting until I run into you with Al Rockbell in Seventh year.” James shrugs. “I really don’t care who you shag, as long as you are happy, mate.”

Remus’ face lits up with relief. All eyes turn to Sirius then, except Remus’, who starts playing with the hem of his shirt.

“It’s fine with me too, Moony,” he shrugs, awkwardly, his voice softer than he intended. He can’t say anything else, too afraid that his voice might betray him.

They go back to other topics, Peter giving Remus a respite by interrogating Lily about the best way to ask Mary out.

Sirius puts a smile on his face, but his mind is racing. So far, he has gathered that 1) Remus is gay, 2) Remus doesn’t have a boyfriend, and 3) that includes him. 

Something unsettling gets on the pit of his stomach, but he dismisses it.

So this means that Remus and he are just messing around. Sirius is okay with it. He is. Definitely.

When Lily asks him if he’ll be taking someone to the wedding, he just jokes about keeping his promise of not dating, and quickly announces that he’s going to lay down for a bit before returning home because he feels a bit tipsy, before his friends can offer to set him up after the wedding.

\---

Over the next week, Sirius’ life is hectic. He helps James setting everything for the wedding. He has to prepare to give the Auror’s admission test. He is fooling around with Remus every free second that he has. Of course, they don’t talk about it.

They fuck - properly - two days before the wedding. Even if Sirius feels a bit clumsy, it’s properly mind-blowing. The sex itself it’s alright, they fumble around a bit, Sirius unsure of the correct angles and positions to fuck his friend without hurting him, but Remus laughs and talks to him the whole time, encouraging him with the softest sounds and sweetest words. 

And when Remus asks him to lay down so he can ride him, and lays in his chest with his arms on the side of Sirius’ head to support himself while he kisses him and Sirius pushes into him, Sirius is lost. He feels so lucky to be with this amazing person in any way that he would allow him, that he can’t think anymore. He makes himself accelerate the pace so he has no time to dwell about his feelings until his orgasm washes everything away for a moment.

He manages to convince Remus - who is little more than putty at the moment - to stay in his bed for the night, and sleeping with Moony’s smell on his nose and his arms around his waist is another level of amazingness.

The next morning, he and James are setting the flowers in the wedding tent on James’ and Lily’s backyard when he simply breaks with the overwhelming mixture of happiness and confusion.

“Hey, James,” he calls his best friend over. “I’m fucking Moony. I mean, me and Moony, we are sleeping together. We’re fucking.”

James drops the flowers that he was levitating and goes quiet before barking a laugh.

“Fuck, Padfoot, couldn’t you give me a warning?”

Sirius fixes the flowers and levitates them to form the arc that James was trying to make.

“Sorry, mate. I didn’t intend to tell you, it just slipped out of my mouth.”

James frowns.

“So what, are you queer too? Are you two together?”

“I don’t know man… I mean, I like Moony. Having sex with him is fucking amazing. I don’t know what that makes me, it’s not like I want to fuck other men, I think.”

James nods, a smile in his eyes.

“So, you two together?”

“Mmm, not really. It’s not like we have talked about it. You know Moony; when he doesn’t want to talk about something there’s no way of making him. He just evades talking about what’s going on between us. I think it’s just some company for him, giving this goddamn war. Something simple and uncomplicated. You heard him the other day: he doesn’t have a boyfriend. And that includes me,” he adds bitterly.

“And for you?” 

“What about me?” He asks and cringes at how bad his attempt at deflecting is.

“What do you feel for Moony? Do you want to be with him?”

Sirius stays quiet for a moment, his eyes on the flowers. He can feel James’ myopic eyes on him.

“Well…” he ponders, trying to find a way to put his emotions into words. “Well, Moony is brilliant. He is smart and funny, and sweet and, and _soft_ , and caring, and he smells like tea and has so many jumpers that it’s ridiculous. And he always knows what to say and what to do when I’m overwhelmed. And now he looks at me and his eyes can keep me in my place, Prongs, root me where I am with a single glance. He makes me clumsy and grin like an idiot at random times of the day, and makes me want to improve my cooking so I can bring him proper food after the full. And he makes me want to find out what I want to do after the war, like properly plan it, not just ‘be alive and young forever,’ you know.”

He feels really light after blurting all that out. He feels like a light _idiot_ if he is being honest, and he’s ready for James making fun of him.

“Woah, Padfoot.” James looks pleased and confused. “That’s a lot of feelings and a lot of words to not answer if you want to be with him.”

Sirius takes a deep breath. Even with all that he said about Remus, what can he say about that?

“I don’t know, Prongs. I don’t know. I think the whole friends with benefits situation is good, but I think that given that we are such close friends, it sounds like I want more when I had most of these feelings before sleeping with him. I think this is just how our friendship is.”

James looks up over his glasses and shakes his head.

“Or, Padfoot, hear me out, you had feelings, proper feelings for him _before_ sleeping with him, and you are now trying to rationalize them as ‘friendship’ because you are too scared that Moony will reject you. Which, by the way, I don’t think would happen. I can’t be sure, of course, but the way you two are with each other… I don’t know, sometimes it seems like you are the only thing that Moony can look at.”

Sirius is silent for a moment, so when he finally says “Oh, fuck off, Prongs, you don’t know what you are talking about,” it sounds feeble and slightly ridiculous.

After that, they laugh and decide to focus on the wedding that is less than 24 hours away and leave this conversation for later.

\---

The wedding is everything that James and Lily wanted, and Sirius is choking on emotions by the end of the ceremony. There are less than 50 guests, and everyone is happy leaving the war outside of the tent for the night. They eat, toast for the Potters, and dance. Sirius keeps searching for Remus amongst the guests. He sees him in a corner talking to Caradoc, and something squeezes his heart, but then Remus looks straight into his eyes from all across the tent and smiles, and everything falls back into place.

“Are you going to tell him how you feel?”

Sirius almost jumps out of his skin when Lily speaks close to his ear.

“What?”

She smiles sweetly at him.

“Come on, dance with me,” and she pulls him to the dance floor.

Lily doesn’t say anything else about it, so Sirius acts like he didn’t hear her. His eyes, though, keep looking for Remus, and every time they find him, he is looking at Sirius, heavy gaze following his movements.

Lily squeezes his hand at the end of the song and kisses his cheek before going to James. Remus is by his side then, a small smile on his lips.

“Wanna go out for a fag?”

“Do you want to dance with me?” Sirius asks almost at the same time.

Remus laughs, but takes his hand and pulls him back to the dance floor. Neither of them is a good dancer - Sirius might be marginally better, and both of them are better than James, no doubt -, but it doesn’t matter. They laugh and swing on the dance floor, close to their other friends. Even Sirius recognizes that the way they look at each other is special, far too intimate to not be noticed, but he doesn’t care.

They dance for a long time. Some people leave the dance floor and others come in, but the two of them stay until Remus tells him to meet at a table, that he’ll be there in a minute after he grabs some drinks.

Sirius falls into a chair, happy and tired. In no time, Peter is sitting at one of his sides; James and Lily at the other.

“What now, is there some mischief to be accomplished?”

“No mischief at our wedding,” says James, grinning.

Peter pulls at his hair.

“I just don’t know what else I need to tell you for you to pay me, mate. This is the most stupid situation that I’ve witnessed, and remember I was _there_ for the first attempt in Hogwarts history of two first-years to prank the seventh year’s Slytherins.”

Sirius laughs.

“Well, yes, it is stupid Peter, but you still haven’t won his money. Not until Padfoot tells Remus what he feels,” says James. 

“Well, technically, that’s not part of the rules, love” Lily meddles.

“Yes! And I really can’t see how you are not covering the third and first condition, at least. And I think most people in here think you are together…”

Sirius is quiet for a second.

“Prongs, you big traitor.”

“Hey, happy couple! Already tired of dancing, Lily?”

As if all of his friends knowing about his feelings for Remus isn’t bad enough, the man himself approaches them, smiling. This looks like a setup, from all corners. And gods as witnesses, is Peter Pettigrew going to pay for this. It doesn’t matter it’s not his fault, Peter always has something to pay for.

“I just needed a break, Remus, and we were making sure that Padfoot here pays our money for breaking his vow.”

Remus looks sad and uncertain for a second before covering it up whit an aloof expression.

“Oh, I see. Is Sirius dating someone then? He was so close, only five more days and he would have been clear.”

“The thing is, Moony, my old friend,” James starts, standing up and taking Remus by the shoulders, making him seat in his vacant chair. Sirius can feel his hands starting to sweat, not sure what stupid thing James Potter is about to say. “That the conditions that Peter set have proved to be difficult to assess, to say the least. Peter, will you do the honours of recalling them?”

Sirius groans and drops his head.

“Of course, most distinguished groom. First condition: Sirius takes someone he’s been sleeping with to a social event, as this wedding for example or, say, a family dinner. Second condition: Sirius is called someone boyfriend, being by that person or someone else. Unfortunately, we didn’t consider the reversed possibility: a person being called Padfoot’s partner. My bad, I’ll take the blame on that one. Third condition: Sirius goes out repeatedly, in a short period, with someone that he has a romantic interest in, even if he doesn’t accept such interest. In that case, we, being Lily, James and I, are the ones with the decision about Sirius’ intentions. A second mistake might be posed in this case: what if the ‘romantic interest’ doesn’t recognize the intentions of our dear Padfoot either? This means that we see a relationship that looks like dating, but it’s not it yet.” Peter grins, proud of his summary. Remus is starting to blush, and Sirius takes his head between his fingers. If this wasn’t Prongs wedding, he’ll be already hexing them all.

“So you see, Moony, our system isn’t infallible. As you probably are considering in your own mind, we have a strong case against you and Sirius being somewhat together, even when you two thick heads won’t acknowledge it. I’m guessing that in your case, Moony, your avoidance has to do with the fact that you don’t know where Sirius stands. In his case, he’s just being an idiot.” 

Remus is starting to shake by his side. Sirius is quite sure that if he didn’t have James’ hands on his shoulders, he would already found an excuse to leave. But James’ hands are firmly set, and Sirius knows how hard it can be to shake them off.

“You see, Remus, we know that the conditions of the first scenario were met,” says Lily sweetly and conciliatory. “But not in the right order. We know that for the second scenario, the reverse condition that Peter referred has occurred because most of the members of the Order think you two are a couple. And with the third condition, well… Peter explained that pretty well. So you see the conflict now, don’t you?” Lily smiles and takes Remus’ face with her hand to make him look at her. “We really think that you two should talk. Talk for real, this time. We think that what you have, or could have, can be great…”

“If only you would take your heads out of your butts, if I dare say - and I _dare_ , only because this is our wedding and I’m now married to Lily _Evans_. I mean, _Potter._ ” James adds, proudly.

“Lily…” Remus says weakly. “I really don’t think… Sirius doesn’t feel that way about me. I was just preventing an awkward situation. It’s fine with me. It is, I swear.”

And then is when Sirius realizes it. The flirting, the longing, the intense gazes from Remus’ side had always been there. They were there in school, but Sirius couldn’t recognize them. Yes, Remus came back more confident after his time in Scotland, probably at peace with his sexuality, but the core of their relationship didn’t change then, but has been changing since their teenage years. _He’ll take whatever this wonderful person will give him_ , he remembers thinking something like that when they first had sex. Well, apparently, it’s time to start giving too.

“Wormtail,” he calls, startling his friends after such a long silence. He can feel Remus’ eyes on him, but he is too nervous to look at him. He digs in his pockets. “Here. Lily, James, I’ll give you your money on Monday.” He gives Peter the 30 golden coins and turns to look directly at Remus. He can feel his heart in his mouth. This is a terribly corny thing to do, he knows, but this is _Remus fucking Lupin_ , and he has to go with everything he has: all his honesty, all his stupid ideas. Because he deserves it. And because Sirius really, really wants to give this, that they’ve been building for so long, a real chance. “I won’t presume that we are dating, but you should know that the third scenario is real, from my side at least. And it would make me really happy if you would like to date me. Not with Peter’s rules, but with real people conditions: with both of us wanting to give this a chance.”

He is sure that if he hadn’t been through so much in his life, he’ll be trembling now, maybe even puking. Putting himself out like this, risking being ignored by Remus for the rest of the year - risking their friendship - is both the stupidest and the best idea he ever had. 

He can see Remus’ shock and disbelief, so Sirius’ steels himself for the blow.

“I think you guys might need some privacy. Why don’t you go back into the house and talk for a bit?” James chimes up, his face getting between the two of them. Sirius loves him and knows that he should be grateful from stoping his heart being broken in front of everyone, but he also wants to strangle him for prolonging this agony.

“You are right, James. Sirius?” Remus stands up, looking resolute now. Sirius gulps, feeling sad and ashamed for doing such a foolish thing like following his friends’ advice.

He walks behind Remus like a man to the gallow and doesn’t react until they are in the small room beside the stairs. He closes the door and chances a look at Remus.

He is smiling. His eyes are shining like deep wheels of fire. Remus takes a step, and another, and takes hold his hand timidly. 

“Are you sure, Padfoot?” his voice is so small, barely a raspy whisper, their noses almost touching.

He can feel his heart in his throat.

“Yes, Moony. I know it took me some time to realize it and come clean to myself, but I’m sure. Everything with you is amazing, has been amazing. I know it’ll be hard too,” he adds when he sees Remus bite his lip. “I really know it. A lot is going on, and I know that we, that _I_ can make pretty stupid decisions sometimes that can backlash in the people I love.” He swallows, worried that this might scare Remus away. “But if you are willing to give this a chance, give _me_ a chance, I think we can make it work. More than that, I think we can be brilliant together. You _are_ so good to me, Remus, and I know I can try to be good to you too.”

Remus’ squeezes his hand, his eyes softening. He bites his lip again.

“I think we are already brilliant together, Pads. All of us. Always been. And these months, these months have been more than anything I ever expected, than I ever dreamed. Everything is so _easy_ with you. I always thought that if we ever got together, we’d tear each other up mercilessly. That’s why I tried to convince myself that this wasn’t anything more than something physical. But it could never be like that between us, don’t you think? There’s so much history, such a charged relationship to start with... And even with that, now I realize that dating you has been the easiest thing I’ve done in my life.” His eyes shine with mirth, before Sirius’ pushes forward, unable to stop himself, and traps Remus against the wall, their lips locking together. Sirius can’t stop himself from laughing in the middle of the kiss, and Remus has to shush him so they can kiss properly.

When they part, Remus laughs with his forehead on Sirius’ shoulder, as he did so many months ago when they reunited, his hands fisting Sirius’ shirt. Sirius smiles to himself, his fingers stroking Remus’ back. 

And he thinks that indeed, dating Remus has been one of the easiest things in his life. 

\---

They get back to the tent, holding hands. They are immediately accosted by their friends, who pat their backs and give them glasses of alcohol to toast for the future.

They laugh at their antics and after indulging them, they go dancing.

It looks like the beginning of a good thing, Sirius thinks. _It is_ , he reassures himself, watching Remus laugh while twirling Lily, James perched on his shoulder smiling benignly at the scene, and Peter holding on for dear life on James’ arm, snickering drunkenly into his hand. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Please leave a comment if you can, they are so important! It's what helps us understand what you think about fics and keeps us motivated. 
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr with the same pseud if you want to chat. I love making friends from around the world.


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